Challenging Week
been a crazy week for me. many thots with a thousand thgs in my agenda.
a long conversation with my sister last week lead me thinking if it is time to start planing abt settling down.
i cant compared to my 2 sisters though, to marry young. i cant imagine myself marrying any time soon. but neither can i stop fantasizing how my wedding day will look like, how is it like to be a wife, daughter-in-law, and a mother.
it seems a lot tougher for me to think straight abt this issue. i have a perfect guy who wants me to be part of his life in the future. i can so see us together, having a family of our own. a guy who makes the extra effort to keep this relation going. so wat exactly is the big deal?
i had been so used to my singlehood in singapore. somehow, i have always been involved in a distant relationship since i started dating. i nv thot much abt settling down esp not before i hit 30's. it always seemed to be a near impossible thing for me.
for the past few days, i had been thinking abt it. there are so many decisions to make. how ready am i? i know that i have to move to where he is and start my life with him in order for us to keep this going. so wat are the steps i should take?
5 comments:
of course we all think a lot before we decide to spend our entire life with someone. :) its normal to worry and stress dear..
but i only have to say...its really hard to find someone who truly loves you and you love the person. if he is the person you want to grow old with and laugh at each other's wrinkles and balding head...then maybe u should discuss with him. If work here doesnt allow u to get married. perhaps an get engaged her or something la
I got married young. It turned out to be a good idea for me personally but not everyone is cut out for it.
I'm not sure what the social codes
are about a couple living together before marriage but in my experience living in the same household with your future partner
for at least six months can tell you what the next 50 years are going to be like.
One common misconception is that marriage changes people. this is not exactly true. It changes their lifestyle, responsibilities and future goals but the person inside always stays the same.
If there is a behavior or personal trait making you reluctant to marrying a particular person the only solution is to learn to accept
that behavior or not spend your life with them.
I have seen many marriages end due to unreasonable expectations and lack of communication.
I wish you the best on whatever you decide. The fact that you are openly contemplating this possible step in your life shows much maturity and wisdom.
As much as it seems almost like a necessity, marriage is also really a stigma in its own way. I can't help but to see it as branding, a cry out to tell people 'look we are Mr. and Mrs XXX'. I'm not against marriage, in fact I'd love to have one myself one day, in a liberal environment, but I do feel that marriage now has been made too complicated especially in it's implications. After all, end of the day, it's only about 2 persons.
to be exact im not young anymore, no mattter how much im in denial of that. LOL. im going to be 30 in a few years time. ARGH!!!~~~
well, work allows me to be there and he is the best person for me. the only one who has ever make me even think abt settling down, one who accept me with my faults and overly high ambitions.
but i guess alot of my hesitant is coming fr the fear of going to a place that im not familiar with. a place that i have to start all over again. thats why i feel envious that shirley has the courage to embake on a new journey in her life.
however, in my opinion, as much as i hope that marriage is only abt 2 person, in most asians' cases, it involes the whole family... like it or not.
right now i have to sought out a balance to make it work. i'll go bonkas if im trying to build a loving family and successful career at the same time. the priority level is definately going to be different.
yalo yalo... marriage should only concern the 2 pple, but somehow everyone will be dragged in one... the most basic is the family, then sometimes also got friends included... haiz... pple juz like to complicate things and make life difficult for themselves lo, i guess... haha... :D
sui yuan ba. ;)
--kf
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