2nd work place

So I now work 2 places. 1 is a factory hand, the other is a retail sales gal. Think I might be able to handle the 2. The 1st place is just pure labour work. I get so sick of it sometimes. The 2nd, LoLz, I must say, it's pretty easy. Although I have to learn about the products that we are selling, 3/4 of the time I am interpreting for the manager and the boss. The boss is from China, and knows limited english. So I have to go back and forth with EVERYTHING that they are trying to converse. I repeat myself so much that I get blur sometimes. But it's cash. So, it's okie then.

Wish that I can be dancing instead of leading this kinda boring life.

Looking forward to drinking session this Sunday. But I can't drink if I have to work on Monday. Hmmm... agony... Hoping for double pay too. So what to do?

And I also need my long overdue massage. My body feels like it is going to shatter soon.

Home Sick

The stars were bright. As I looked at the surrounding of my house, I felt somewhat alienated. I am truly homesick. 

Haven't logged in to FB for a while. Browsing through my friends' profiles, looking at their pictures, I can't help but feel envious. The life that I once so enjoyed is no longer valid for me. 

I'm afraid of changes. I don't take it well. And due to this, I am surprised that I chose to leave Singapore. Eric is perfect. Everything that I wanted for as a husband. I can't complain more. So why this aching in my heart?

I try not to contact my friends too much. Not because I have forgotten them. But because, other than saying I miss them, I can't find words to further describe my feelings. Still, I tried to make an effort, cos they are important. I hunger for the details of their life, that is now denied to me. They make the usual complaints, of work, of their mundane life. I see them as colors that fill my darkened sky. I have no motivation at all. The drive and the excitement that I used to have, where are they?

I wonder when the aching will go away, when I can finally accept this strange place as home. A friend told me that it took her 3 years to find it. Will it take me that long too? Where can I find that strength? 

Furnitures arrival!!

Our furnitures came in this morning at 8am! Whoo-hooo! We started assembling it immediately and boy, was it a long and tough job. We were lucky that Jude and Cleo came over to help us. So here's some pics of the new look. But we still have a mountain of rubbish to clear. It will take us over a month just to clear the cardboards.

Hot Busy Day

Last night I couldn't sleep again. ZZZ... Eric's mum bought him some pills to boost his stamina. Think it was Tung Gui. I took 1 in the afternoon. Then at night I was so wild awake. As if I had taken coffee. Bad bad pill. No more energy boost for me...

Today's super hot. No wind, just sunny sun. I decided be to lazy and not pole. So, I started loading up the old pics. hahha. Till now, I'm only half completed with my collection. Will do the rest again. Maybe when I go back Singapore I will photo those that I had not done so. Come to think of it, it's really nice to look back it the pictures. I was so ugly back then. It makes me laugh out loud just to see how nerdy and silly I was. My fashion sense was horrendous. Eww.. Can't imagine it. Lolz. But those were the days that makes us who we are today. heheh

2 nights ago, my brother skyped me. Mum and dad were there and they were all so excited that they looked animated! Oh how I miss them. As usual, Dad couldn't hear much, so he just watched the conversation. 1st thing that mum said was to move the computer away from our sleeping area. hahha. It will be done this sat where the furnitures will arrive! hooray! Everyone knows that I miss mum's cooking, esp her soup. So Mum said that if she can she will feed me over skype!

Better Tuesday

It really feels good to be 'connected' back to the world. What has the world come to? Or is it just me that I need the internet for blogging, youtubing, facebooking and gaming? Now I dun feel that depress anymore since I can surf all day long. And I realised that so many things have happened to my friends. But most part I feel envy, that I am no longer there to be part of their lives, and to perform.

This afternoon I tried doing some Zumba workout from youtube. Saw the advertisements going on and on late last night. Thought that it might help me to break some sweat for poling. Well, it worked a tiny bit. Zumba is all about cardio workout. After 15 mins of it I felt so breathless. Must time myself. lolz.

Poling is not so fun now. Exercising is never fun alone. Haiz.. But good news is although I haven't gotten all my strength back, I managed to do something that I saw Sesomy did in the vidz. Now I will have to catch up to her. She is really strong now. So, Sesomy, if you are reading this, please load your achievements so that I can watch. Ah, Ming always reads my blog, so Ming, can you update her? haha. 

Oh yeah, saw Ming's new products for poling. Really love them. My wish lists: Pole mattress, pink grey shorts, pink black shorts, pink top, red top, and pink black top. And NO MING, wish list is not for you. 

I was packing my clothes the other day, and realised that I already have lots to wear for poling. But hey, gals just like pretty stuff right? 

Got rejected for one of my job application. Well, I just have to keep sending. My bro-in-law offered for me to work in Crown as a dealer. But it's god dam far... I have to walk, take the bus, walk, take the train, walk, take the tram, walk, then reach destination. All up, 1 n 1/2 hrs... Faint... 

I've also sent one to a real estate company. They are looking for various position. Hopefully they will consider me, then I can start my career in this field. 

Still have many things to do, but I keep procrastinating. It's no good. Need some yelling to push me forward.

Lazy Monday

I woke up feeling so lazy. It was cold and the bed was warm. Didn't get off the bed till 2pm.

I tried poling. So lonely to do it alone. I couldn't get myself to perspire at all. So could hardly do inverts at all. Will try it again tomorrow. Needa lose all that fats.

Sent out about 10 resume. From teaching to admin to events to sales. Whatever works.

Erm... Yeah, no more baby thoughts. Lolz

15th November 2009

Hi, I'm back online. Just got my internet connection up this Friday. It really feels great to be connected again.

So a few updates. Been staying at my new home for the past 2 weeks and am starting to get use to this new home. House is still bare. Our furnitures have yet to arrive. We have been using the living room as our makeshift bedroom and computer room. Here are some new pictures of the house now.

The Master Bedroom- the wardrobe mirror over looking at the dressing table.

The Kitchen, and the wall that I refuse to let go.

Eric posing for me in the kitchen.

Some Dollies that refuse to stay hidden.

RO Characters- A game that played a huge role in our lives.

TV Corner. Yes, that luggage does look familiar to many. Please, Shh...

TADA! Our makeshift bedroom.

The room that we want to rent out. Yup, the mattress belongs to this bedframe.

The bathroom after its makeover.

The next 2 pictures is just a light that I bought at the Thai fair in Singapore. I think that it is a gorgeous piece of light. We on it every night to find our way in the dark.

Without Flash

With Flash. Ain't it pretty??

So I've been staying at home most of the time. It's kinda getting a little bit depressing. All alone in the house all day, waiting for Mr Poh to be home. I even have thoughts of baby! *sweatness x10* With no internet, it'd been just TV and sleeping. Why I haven try to get out and explore? I still don't know my way home. And, we're really broke. Since I haven't got myself a job, we have been relying only on Eric's income. We couldn't even make it to his buddy's bro's wedding cos we don't have enough for the red packet. Also, we are about 4k in debt for the furnitures. And yeah, I've become FAT... THAT is the most depressing thing of all. I know that some of you are now laughing your ass off right? But please do it behind my back cos i really don't need anyone rubbing salt on my wound. My poor wounded heart...

Okay, enough about my unhappy issues. Here are some happy news. Eric managed to set up my pole! Yeah! *Run around the room* Thankfully the X-Pole is made to be fixed on plaster boards with joists, and the DVD further convinced Eric. I was almost afraid that I have to give up my pole. Now I'm just missing some pole mates to pole jam with. So I guess it will be lots of youtubing and FB to 'compare notes'. 

That was happiness #1. Next, I've sent some resume out for creative art teaching for a weekend school and a events company that does kids events. Hopefully they will like what I can offer and allow me some gigs once a while. I really don't know how to survive without performing. I miss putting make ups now. Lolz. And like what Tania shared with me, life used to be so easy back then. It was just waking up, dance, then sleep. We didn't have much to worry, and life was always full of fun. So let's hope that they will accept me. 

Tomorrow, I will be searching for more event/ performing companies to send my resume. Then I will look for some 'proper' jobs. Hopefully it can tie us over till I can finish my driving lessons and real estate course before I finally get a real estate company to employ me. I can't imagine myself in office attire and what not. But it's inevitable. So I will start my chapter in the corporate world, and start climbing its ladder. The thought actually makes me feel somewhat strange and awkward. 

Happiness #3 is that Eric might have a great job offer. We are keeping our fingers cross. 

Well, now that I've updated here, it's time to clear my mails and FB. I'm missing out sooooo much... Gosh.. But maybe.. tomorrow.

3rd Monday

Today I had a great dinner. It was in some Vietnamese restaurant. Eric said that their noodles soup is not too bad. So I ordered a bowl of starch noodle, much like Sg mee tai ma, but long strands, with prawns and pig trotter in crab soup. It was a wow! Really good. Didn't think that I would be able to have such good soupy meal. The last time I had a bowl of noodle soup, it tasted like ....

My abs are slowly disappearing. All my hard work's down the drain. Have to work harder to get it back again. Sobz.. FB is like shit recently. Can't log in much.

Okie, updates.

Tomorrow we can finish painting the master bedroom. Then Wednesday we can clean the carpet, Thursday clear out weedforest, Friday no idea yet, Saturday put the furniture into the van and Sunday! Yes, Sunday we are ready to move in. At long last, we can start to have our family life. Lolz.

So expect the pictures to be up really really soon, though some of the furnitures are missing and the rest that we have are old. But for a start, what we have will do.

Great Weather!

Finally today I was able to wear my sleeveless without feeling the cold bitting into my skin. It felt great not to be like a 'ba-zhang' (dumpling) for a change. Too bad the weather will not stay like this. Heard that this summer will be one of the worst ever. 50 degrees! I think it might be worse than when I was at Dubai. By that time it will be lots of sun screen, long sleeves, shawls, and moisturizer all over again! lolz

We did lots today for the house, though not much can be seen from it. His friends came over to help out these few days. It's amazing how much work can be done with a couple more hands. Am really grateful to them. They all just came down after their work. Tired as they were, they still helped out till dinner time.

I hope to get the house done asap. My hands are getting too dry for this kinda work... Poor hands... Need to treat it to some spa after this!

By the way, I lost 2kg!!! Whoo-hoo!

New Week

The kitchen walls were done. The color chosen matched well with the cabinets in the kitchen. Such coincidence. Sadly, we had miscalculated. We had to do double coating for the other walls in the house. That means that we will not be able to move in to the house this week. Unless miraculously we can finish putting the 1st coat by tomorrow, and 2nd coat by Wednesday.

I miss poling much. 

I want some yong tao hu.

I need hair conditioner asap. Hair is like a pile of hay stuck on my head.

My hands are so dry.

I need 48 hrs a day to get the house ready.

And I sleep way too early nowadays.

Nitez.

2nd Sunday

Today was not so cold. That was a blessing. Mum helped to wash the windows laces. It's so hard to deal with the curtains and laces. Well, it's hard to deal with household chores, period. I was a housewife for a full 8hrs the other day, and I nearly died. Lolz. Anywayz, today we have finished all the ceilings. Tomorrow we can start with the walls. Horray!

We have been quite lucky so far. We got so many free stuffs. Mum gave us brand new pots and pans. My mum gave me kettle and coffee maker. His brother gave us TV. And his mum's friend gave us dinner set. All brand new. Nice! Then we got pass down items like cupboards, dressing table, dinning table, beds. Hmm... not too bad. Except that we have to get our own brand new bed eventually. And guess what?

Today while we were helping his father, we chanced upon a LG washing machine outside a house. After asking the owner about the condition of the machine, we brought it back. We had thought that the motor of the machine was faulty or something, but it turned that the owner didn't want it cos it's too noisy. Ha! According to his dad, all we need to do is to centralize the machine and it will solve the issue. So just like that we got ourselves a fairly new 8kg washing machine. 

This really helped us to save a lot. It's a little hard now that we're only surviving on Eric's income. But things are working out pretty well. 

Rainy Thursday

The house is shaping up nicely so i think by next weekend Eric and I should be able to move in. We have just finished painting most of the 2nd coat for the doors and trimmings. Left with some ceilings and walls, sanding and scraping, polishing and cleaning. Can't believe there is so much work.

I still haven find the best location to install the pole that I bought from Ming, and Eric's trying to figure the best way to fit it onto the false ceiling. He is worried that I will fall if I follow what the guide says. He suggested to attach a metal piece onto the joist then fix the pole onto it. I would also think that he is worried that if the pole slipped, it will make a hole some where in the house. Hahah, I can't blame him. I made a hole when I accidentally opened the door with too much strength! Luckily that part of the wall wasn't painted and the builder was at our home to even it out.

I have contacted Pole Divas to 'further my studies'. lolz. They have told me to go down for a grading to fit me in the right class. I wonder if I will get to enjoy myself there as compared to Acro. Hmm... Just have to make do with it, I guess. But I don't think I can make it for their upcoming term on 26th Oct. Still need to learn driving and get a job before I can start building a lifestyle that I like. 

Time to shower now. Will update again. 

Cold and Exhuasted Day 3

My Day 3 here in Melbourne. It was forecasted that it would been a rainy week.

Woke up at 5am again. Somehow I just couldn't sleep after that. Maybe it wasn't such a bad thing. hahah. Think my mum will be most glad of my sudden switch in biological clock.

I was too silly during packing. I thought that since winter was over, I would be needing summer clothes more. So the rest are on their way via shipment. But... it was still so freaking cold! Not sure if I was lucky or suay... I brought 1 autumn jacket with me. It wasn't really enough. However, as compared to my normal Singapore jacket, it provided me with much more comfort. 

As I have mentioned, it was a rainy week. I was feeling so cold while working in the house. I have no idea where my central heating for the house is, so basically, I worked in the cold, for 10 hrs...

Accomplished quite a bit today since I was there early. Hopefully it will be in simple living condition by end of the week.

Day 2

I woke up at 5am today. Could only get back to sleep at about 8am.

Went to the house and started painting. Its in a total mess, but hopefully we will be able to do up major parts of the house so that we can move in by end of the week. Eric will post up the pictures on his FB.

Melbourne, Day 1

Time is short since my Dubai trip. My tea ceremony was postponed. It was uncalled for, but the best option for everyone. I hardly have time to meet everyone, so I apologize for that.

After leaving my family and friends at the gate, I started to miss them 2 mins later. I realized that I didn't hug my sis n niece and wondered how dad was. Had to hear my sis' voice just before boarding.

The flight was uneventful. Managed to watch Transformer 2, though I didn't catch half of the dialog. I was dozing here and there. Arrived at the airport about 8am. Didn't get off the plane till 8.30am. And guess what? It took us another 1 1/2 hrs to get out of the custom. It was 12pm by the time we reached Eric's mum's.

Slept till 7pm. Met up with Eric's mates for a while. Couldn't believe I was that tired, and headed home early.

It felt like a dream. It's still hard to believe that I'm leaving Sg for good and starting my next chapter of life in a new place. I'd always known that I will migrate since I was young. But nothing really prepares for the real departure.

I woke up at 5am. My mind started to jam itself with poling and my new house. It was a nice place from what I'd seen last evening. I wonder how I can make the kitchen look like an old cottage style. And of cos, how and where to install the pole. The dinning area seems like the most logical space. It was too huge to serve as just the dinning room. So I'm thinking to double it up as my pole practice area. But the front door leads to the dinning room, so it is such a good idea to have a pole there? The initial idea was to have the pole in the computer room. However, as the com room doubles up as guest room, it will be too cram to squeeze everything there. 

Hmm.. guess I have to give more thought to the design of the house.

Trust

15 years of strong friendship is now sitting on a fragile point. I am deeply disappointed because I have trusted you so much. I have been giving you a benefit of a doubt. Many doubts. But again and again, you breach the trust. I am on the verge of exploding. But deep inside I am still trying to find an excuse for your behavior. I hope that it is my over sensitivitiness over reacting. Then we can still continue our friendship. However, if you really step over the limit, I will do what ever I can to expose you to everyone, making sure that no one else will be deceived like how I am.

Mum had the whole family's fortune told. Something that she does every year straight after chinese new year. The lady mentioned something not so pleasent that will happen in the future. I can't help thinking about it. It stresses me out. But I have to pretend, pretend that it doesn't matter. Will I be able to prevent it from happeneing? Will it be inevitable? I hope that I won't need to face it...

Ups n Downs of preping for ROM

My excited BF woke me up from my 2 hr sleep so that he can print the ROM ackowledgment from his office.

I am quite frustrated. I can understand his excitement. But it's NOT urgent. To wake me up from my sleep just for that? Now I can't get back to sleep. I can't let him know my frustration. I didn't even call to wake him up when I needed some information while filling up for the ROM. But he has to wake me up to ask for the code, so that he can print it. When we only need the printing version in 3 months time.

This kinda frustration can't be vented at. I can't fault him for it. But when I can't get back to sleep, it pisses me off. It pisses my WHOLE day off. Then later he will ask why I'm so mooody, and I won't be able to answer him back. Then he gets pissed cos I don't wanna 'share' with him.

I need to wake at 3hrs time. I just got 2 hrs sleep. And I'm so uptight now I can't get back to sleep. The tension is building up.

Where are my freaking sleeping pills?!

ROM

At last it's been filed. Getting married is such a hassle. I didn't know that you have to get the name and the license of the solemnizer before registering for it.

So now part one is done.

Next is the wedding card. Still designing it, but the frame is more or less completed too.

Then it's the venue. Strange that I must have a venue when I register for the ROM. I haven even booked it. Wanted to book this monday, but was rejected cos it can only be done 2 months before hand. Stranger still, ROM webbie recommanded that place. So, I can book my ROM 3 months ahead, but one of the venue that they recommanded allows only booking 2 months ahead. hmmm... Hence right now I have to cross my fingers that no one is gonna take that booking, otherwise I will have to rethink of a venue, spoiling my whole plan.

Next, this is like Ah Gong getting married. Hahhahaha! He wants Eric to invite all the relatives. BUT, "we can not expect any ang baos, cos it is just a ROM". Weird, huh? So now I'm having a bad headache. Budget allocated for food is set, which does not include the relatives. Hmm... I really don't wish that the guests go hungry. I hope Eric will tell Ah Gong that we are working on a really tight budget...

Let's see... (based on SGD)
His flight back: 1k
My flight back: 1-1.2k
Rings: 1k
Venue: 1k
Food: 1k
Drinks: 500
Visa: 2k (&^&^%$^$#@#@$%)
Miscellaneaos: 1k
Buffer: 1.5k

So that's 10k.

A 10k ROM. (&^&^%$^$#@#@$%)

It's messing me up bad...

Ah yes, guests list..... *faint*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I just wanna complain, that's all. It's actually not that bad. Just probably doing most things alone is tedious.

Down Under

It's exactly a week since I arrive here. Such a different life; from the 'gliz n glam' of a entertainer to someone who can not find any contacts of entertainment; from a supper lover with the convenience of hawker food to self cooked meals.

Waking is about the same, phone calls from Eric. But after that, it is kinda weird. I'm in a cage waiting for him to be home, hoping that he would not be too tired to bring me out later the night. The only time when I can have this much of freedom. I'm such a monkey, enjoying swinging from tree to tree.

Unlike my stressful life in Singapore, I have nothing to do now. It is all about eating, sleeping, gaming. All the energy that has got no avenue to let out.

That's pretty much all my complaints. Else, it is actually good to take a break. Though the Virgo Brain gets to work and scream at me at times, I must say I did a pretty good job in substaining the little voice from getting my work up and mess up my break.

Eric has been great to me, and doing his best to ensure that I am taken care of. This trip is to see how things go for us, and I must say, we are doing pretty decent.

To summerize, we will be getting ROM some time this year, after August.

Tsk tsk... Think I won't have any luck of romantic proposal, blah...